I like bake sales

I like bake sales. I generally support them.

Growing up I worked a lot of church bake sales. I have a weakness for them.

Most times I'm really happy with my purchase. Sometimes a purchase will disappoint.

I met Court today for lunch at a Ma & Pa Indian buffet right next to City Hall. Court knew a youth organization was having a bake sale inside City Hall, so we decided to get dessert there.

We bought three cookies apiece for me, Court & Amanda. They were toll house cookies.

Only they weren't.

They were awful.

It wasn't a case of bad baking. It was because the cookies came from here.


Can you believe that? I bought cookies I won't even put in my compost, they're so bad. What's worse, I'm pretty sure they were long beyond their expiration date too. Disgusting.

Anybody but him!

Why is it the entire film industry has just one "go to" guy for voicing over movie trailers?

I can't stand that voice. Am I the only person who finds it annoying?

Did they not get the memo?

Court works in an office with a boss who listens to country music. Court likes country, so it's not a bad thing, except that this station is still playing their Christmas rotation.

And as I type this, I am on hold with the IRS. Would you believe I'm having to suffer through a Muzak version of The Nutcracker Suite?

I was already in a bad mood. We were expecting a snow day and instead got only a two hour delay. And now I have to listen to crappy Christmas music and it isn't even Christmas.

At least there is a bright side. My tax refund was direct deposited today.

Am I pregnant or is it my Rx?

Of course we know I can't be pregnant, so WTF is up with me?

I am a complete, irritable BITCH lately. I just want to fucking SCREAM and/or bitch-slap anyone in my way. I'm not just angry, I am RAGING. Stay the fuck out of my way, dammit.

I am hungry famished ALL the time. Last night Court and I had a heavy dinner at her office Christmas party. An hour after we got home I was inhaling a a huge-ass turkey sandwich. This morning I woke up so hungry I thought I was going to dry-heave.

My lower back is fucking killing me. Has been for days.

I'm completely out of whack and I feel like every number on the Bristol chart. The whole mess is a lot like being pregnant.

The only thing I can attribute this to is Effexor. That shit has me totally fucked up. And my doctor just ratcheted up my dose.

Stay away. When I'm like this I get nasty mean.

Bear with me....

while I quit a disgusting habit. It's day three and so far so good. Only one major meltdown so far
(it was a doozy).

Complicating matters, I was home all day yesterday and our Internet service was down. That addiction is far worse than my cigar habit.

It was NOT a good day.

My alma mater called the other day

I got a call Monday from an administrator at BGSU. He contacted me once before, about five years ago.

He wants a copy of the software I custom-design for clients. I'd willingly give it to the man, since he is from my alma mater, but he and I have some history.

I gave a workshop nine years ago in Seattle and everyone in the audience got a scaled-down copy of the software, which is a working simulation tool for strategically discounting tuition. It's worth a lot of money, and I gave it away. The guy who called me today did not attend my workshop, but several years later he looked me up. It turns out his wife is/was the assistant dean of the graduate college that granted me the extension I needed to finish my Ph.D. (BGSU has a seven-year rule, and I was already in year eight and I'd need another two years to see my topic to fruition). Incidentally, the software/ simulation tool I developed was the topic of my dissertation. Naturally I had warm and fuzzy feelings for this man; the husband of the woman who helped changed my life.

We talked on several occasions after his first call. I gave him thousands of dollars worth of free consulting. I sent him a copy of my workshop textbook (an abridged Kinko's version of my 400+ page dissertation). I also sent him the software.

I never heard another word from him until today; not even a thank you or an acknowledgment that he received everything I sent. Asshat.

It's been five years since I last heard from him, and I guess he still can't figure out how to do what I do. He lost the software I sent him and wants me to send it to him again.

I'm not sending it. I politely told him he can hire me, fly me to the campus, and I'll show him how design the software for BGSU.

What have I got to lose? It's been ten years since I last set foot on campus, and I've been wanting to visit ever since. All the better if I can do it on someone else's dime.