My alma mater called the other day

I got a call Monday from an administrator at BGSU. He contacted me once before, about five years ago.

He wants a copy of the software I custom-design for clients. I'd willingly give it to the man, since he is from my alma mater, but he and I have some history.

I gave a workshop nine years ago in Seattle and everyone in the audience got a scaled-down copy of the software, which is a working simulation tool for strategically discounting tuition. It's worth a lot of money, and I gave it away. The guy who called me today did not attend my workshop, but several years later he looked me up. It turns out his wife is/was the assistant dean of the graduate college that granted me the extension I needed to finish my Ph.D. (BGSU has a seven-year rule, and I was already in year eight and I'd need another two years to see my topic to fruition). Incidentally, the software/ simulation tool I developed was the topic of my dissertation. Naturally I had warm and fuzzy feelings for this man; the husband of the woman who helped changed my life.

We talked on several occasions after his first call. I gave him thousands of dollars worth of free consulting. I sent him a copy of my workshop textbook (an abridged Kinko's version of my 400+ page dissertation). I also sent him the software.

I never heard another word from him until today; not even a thank you or an acknowledgment that he received everything I sent. Asshat.

It's been five years since I last heard from him, and I guess he still can't figure out how to do what I do. He lost the software I sent him and wants me to send it to him again.

I'm not sending it. I politely told him he can hire me, fly me to the campus, and I'll show him how design the software for BGSU.

What have I got to lose? It's been ten years since I last set foot on campus, and I've been wanting to visit ever since. All the better if I can do it on someone else's dime.