Drunkard's meme

From Syd (pictured here): 40 things which every drunk should accomplish. I'm surprised to have said YES on 19 of these, since alcohol is not my drug of choice.

1. Open and close a bar. ALMOST: Court and I closed a bar last week.

2. Go on a bender for 4 days. NO. I've been on benders, but not with alcohol.

3. Drink a fifth of hard liquor, by yourself, in one day. NO.

4. Dance like a fool in front of a large hooting crowd. NO, never danced for a crowd. But as a teen I played guitar for drunks and made a lot in tips.

5. Spend a night in the drunk tank. NO.

6. Get drunk on the grave of your hero? NO.

7. Buy a crowded bar a round. NO.

8. Embark on an impromptu road trip. YES. lots and lots of times.

9. Get 86’d from a bar. YES.

10. Extravagantly over-tip a bartender. YES.

11. Walk up to an attractive stranger, way out of your league, and buy him or her a drink. NO.

12. Conspire an after hours at your favorite bar. YES.

13. Make your best friend a perfect martini. NO.

14. Buy, build or steal a home bar. YES

15. Get carried home by your drinking buddies. YES, too many times back in the day.

16. Get drunk with your father. NO.

17. Fight a good fight. YES. Once. She's missing a tooth.

18. Visit the source of your favorite beer, wine or liquor. YES. Well, sort of. Can't say it's my favorite beer. I drove past Miller Brewing in Milwaukee every day on my way to work, toured the brewery, and also visited the Pabst mansion.

19. Drunkenly watch the sun come up with your best buddies and a bottle? YES.

20. Sit in on an A.A. meeting? NO.

21. Hit a dozen bars in one night. NO.

22. Try at least one hundred different drinks. NO.

23. Get loaded in the land of your forefathers. NO.

24. Juice on the job. YES.

25. Split a magnum of expensive champagne with your true love. NO.

26. Give a hobo twenty bucks. YES.

27. Get loaded and tell your boss exactly how you feel. NO, but maybe I'll do it on Friday.

28. Send a friend a bottle of good liquor. YES.

29. Eat a pickled egg from the big jar. YES.

30. Go on a fishing trip with your pals. NO. Lots of camping weekends though.

31. Eat the worm? NO.

32. Learn at least one traditional drinking song. YES.

33. Steal some booze. YES.

34. Spend half a paycheck on a single bottle of liquor. YES, back when my paychecks were laughable.

35. Start your personal autobiography. NO.

36. Try absinthe. NO.

37. Watch the movie Barfly with five of your closest friends. YES, if you count siblings.

38. Work at least a week as a bartender. NO.

39. Make your own beer, wine or moonshine. YES, beer.

40. Go to your place of worship loaded. YES.