One of my graduate professors sent me an email earlier this week. He and a couple of my classmates are organizing a reunion and they'd like me to attend. This is all well and good.There is nothing like the bond you have with your graduate school classmates. You become a tight knit cohort suffering through the same classes, the same nonsensical academic
The last time I saw many of my classmates, they were toasting me at my wedding. For others, the last time was when I left Bowling Green 18 months later. I was ABD and six months pregnant. And for others it was when a happy looking family -- me, Raj and a four year old Amanda -- made a last trip to Bowling Green for my graduation.
Obviously, a lot has changed since then.
So here I am, once more, coming out AGAIN. Though it gets easier, I still hate that it has to be done.
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I ran into a friend from med school the other day and her first sentence to me was, "Wow, you are much better looking than you were ten years ago."
I didn't know what to say. Maybe.."Wow. Maybe it is because I'm not sleep deprived and under so much stress that I laugh at funerals and cry at funny jokes? And well...you have really gotten pudgy now that we aren't living on diet pepsi anymore.."
I think I have come out about ten times now. Each time, it gets less and less shocking, so maybe there is some progress?
It totally bites that it has to be done at all. There's always that lump in the back of my throat, wondering how someone is going to react. Fuck 'em if they don't like me, but I just don't want to have to get into a conflict over it.
I'm in touch with a large number of high school friends through Classmates (dot-com). I made sure to be out in my bio there, saving having to do it over and over again in emails or at reunions.
It does get a little bit tedious ... it's like, "Haven't I done this before (and before, and before, and before, and before ... )?"
Alas. Fortunately, I was out in grad school (although the only one outta the closet amongst a couple of major closet cases) so that is one less time amongst hundreds that I'll have to continue to do over a lifetime.
Been there, done that! Married in during my MS (no pun intended) and out during my PhD. Fortunately, I continued to play softball with the same IM team...and they spread the word for me around my old department!
But it just goes on and on and on and on....
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